Today I'm torn.
Tried by no one, nor accounted for by anyone.
I am not forced to make any decisions.
I am simply left alone.
To my awful self, who is driven to madness.
I am surrounded by darkness and fear.
There is nothing in sight to bring me back.
The past returns and attacks my soul again and again.
I do not think to run away or to hide.
I walk alone in the darkness.
Afraid and not courageous enough to cry for help.
I decide to let it come.
To end me and turn me to a heartless.
To feel nothing and wander like a drone.
I'm not fighting, I'm tired.
My dignity is gone.
I'm not worthy of respect or love.
Tomorrow will not come, the dawn of hope is faulty.
The sun will not come again.
It's warmth is not given to those that are undeserving.
Instead it flees and takes everyone it respects with it.
I am left to die in the dark.
To die even without a hope.
The sun will not rise.
I will not feel this love.
I shudder as the cold comes.
Touching what once was my heart.
Now it becomes like every other organ, useless.
I don't know whether I'm sleeping or not because even if I were
my dreams would be enveloped in darkness.
It seams to have been days, months, maybe years without light.
I've forgotten the feeling of it.
There's noise though.
Footsteps.
Heavy breathing.
Screaming of fear.
"Hello? Can I help?"
The footsteps stop.
They shift.
Then approach.
"I'm afraid. Please don't leave me alone."
Clearly a woman.
"I won't I promise."
She approaches, reaching out and grabs my arm and lowers to my hand.
Now we won't get lost.
Her hand in mine creates heat.
It's incredible.
I haven't felt this in so long.
It's spreading, I can feel my body warm up.
My heart is thawing.
My hand is continuing to get warmer and warmer.
But now a weird glow is coming from our hands.
She gasps.
I gasp.
The glow gets brighter and eventually it's practically blinding.
It's spreading across our bodies.
Together we are creating this light.
Together we've brought this impractical feat to happen.
Together we are our own sun and we no longer have to live in the dark.
